Sisters are often very close yet they hardly ever toast each other on their birthdays. That’s a shame because they would not have to do any research on their subject. Knowing their sister they could speak from the heart. They could talk of childhoods spent together, of family vacations and of school days and their happenings. They could mention teenage parties and shared clothes. Sisters usually want each other to have the best things in life so why do they not express that wish at a birthday bash? In fact a sister is the ideal person to organise a birthday party . So go on, toast her and tell her you love her. She’ll be touched and thrilled.

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Every birthday is important.After all it says that we have lived another year. It says that we have lived and loved and worked for another twelve months. Yet perhaps the 21st birthday is the one that is celebrated most of all. That’s understandable because it says that the celebrant is at the cusp of living an adult life. It’s a time when childhood is left behind and it’s a time to toast the future. That’s why parents or friends of the birthday boy or girl usually give a speech. They usually refer to the celebrant’s childhood, personality, hobbies and skills. That, naturally, is what makes the speech so personal. After all such a speech should be personal so that the celebrant knows you have written your speech based on your knowledge and liking for him or her. So if he is a good soccer player for instance you will refer to his knowledge and expertise in that field. More importantly, though, that speech should be about what you wish for him or her in the future. So your speech should be challenging and motivational. It should speak of the opportunities ahead. Above all it should end with a toast that summarises all those good wishes.

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If you are the birthday boy or girl, speak out. After all at most birthday parties someone will give a toast to the celebrant. The guests will usually be people who are close to you. It’s the ideal opportunity for you to speak too and say how much those present mean in your life. If someone has organised a party for you it’s a good opportunity to say a gracious thank you. It’s the right time too to say how much their friendship or their kinship means to you. You might share some of your hopes and dreams with those present or mention some happening in the past. Naturally too you will thank them for their gifts and cards, not to mention their good wishes. Birthdays are about that feel good factor so why not make your guests feel good too. End up your little speech with a toast to family and friends.

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What will you say at your friend’s birthday bash? Most of us leave it to relatives to give birthday toasts but it is an ideal opportunity to tell a friend just what he or she means in your life. After all they don’t choose their family but they do choose you. So you must have something that appeals to them and they must have something in their make-up that calls out to you. So if it is your friend’s 40th birthday stand up and be counted by saying what he or she means to you. Talk about shared incidents or his or her kindness to you when you were ill or in trouble. Speak about the interests you have in common and the things you do together. Make it light-hearted because a birthday is not a time for sad stories. Above all try to find a toast that is particularly appropriate to end your speech.

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Give credit where it is due. That’s the rule when it comes to toasting someone on their birthday. If, for instance, it is your dad’s 70th birthday you should express your feelings for him. Being loving doesn’t have to mean being sloppy of course. It simply means that you express your love in a sincere way. If he likes humour then obviously you can toast him with some light-hearted comments. After all birthdays are about parties and nobody wants to listen to a deep, meaningful speech. So you can say that despite the fact that he never got a manual on rearing children he obviously had the knack since he reared you in exemplary fashion. You can give details of some outstanding things he has done for you or say that he was in it for the long haul and the daily grind. Whatever you say should be about him and the life he has led. You can speak about the changes he has seen in that lifetime. You might also like to speak about the people with whom he shared his days. So praise him, thank him and express the wish that he will continue to be such a wonderful dad for many years to come

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Christmas parties may be over but the New Year still brings plenty of opportunity to party. Take your mother’s 70th birthday for example. It’s a time for a family celebration and of course it’s a time to toast her with a very personal toast. Mothers are, after all, the backbones of most families and it is an ideal opportunity to tell her publicly how much you love and respect her. So speak of the things she has done for you over the years. Mention how she stayed with you in hospital when you were rushed in with appendicitis. Speak of how she attended all your school games and concerts. Talk about the way she always cooks your favourite meals when you visit. Make her feel appreciated by what you say. Tell her how much she means to others too and that everyone present shares the feeling that she is a very special person. Birthdays are a time for remembering the past but they are also a time for looking forward to the future. So, above all, tell her that you hope to be toasting her again in another ten or twenty years’ time.

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Fathers often give them. Mothers give them too but how often do you give a toast on your friend’s birthday? If you are a good friend you undoubtedly have lots to say about the celebrant so why not let your friend know how much he means in your life? Why not let the other guests know just what a nice person he is? We often remember when nice things are said about us. Years later we will be able to quote word for word the complement somebody paid us in the past. A birthday then is the ideal time to say publicly how much you appreciate having a friend like that. You might mention some incident that made him special to you. He may have loaned you his car when your own broke down or visited you every day when you were in hospital. Acknowledge that on your friend’s 40th birthday. Toast him and even though you may roast him a little too tell everyone what a nice he really is.

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Make someone feel special on their birthday. Of course you will send a card or give a gift and that’s nice. The birthday boy or girl will certainly appreciate the fact that you went to so much trouble. Telling them they are special is even better. If you give a birthday toast and say how much the celebrant means to you will be giving him or her a memory for life. We all like to be appreciated and usually we know our family and friends do appreciate us. They may even tell us they love us. But if you tell someone publicly that they are special to you and give the reasons why they are bound to feel gratified. If you mention some good deed they have done, or some attribute of theirs they will feel even better. Of course you can easily say that you wish someone many happy returns. It is more difficult to give a toast that is meaningful and meant. It’s well worth the effort though. So go on, give them what they deserve a toast that says “You are wonderful and very, very special.

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Birthday parties don’t have to be held in the Ritz. The recession has hit us all and cutting back is now the name of the game. Some things though are priceless and one of those things is telling people just how important they are. So even if the birthday party is smaller this year it doesn’t mean that you can’t say all those nice things you think about the birthday boy or girl. A birthday is the ideal time to tell someone you love them. It’s the ideal time to point out what they mean to those gathered in their honour. It’s just the right occasion to mention their talents and achievements. So whether you have a daughter who is sweet sixteen or a husband who is hitting fifty tell them just how important they are to you. If you use the right words you will give them a memory to cherish for life and that’s more important that the most expensive birthday party could ever be.

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A coming of age should be celebrated. There should be a party with a cake and candles and there should be a toast given to the birthday boy or girl. After all it is a once in a lifetime occasion. It should be a day that he or she will remember for the rest of his or her life. Often the celebrant will receive lots of cards and plenty of gifts. The most important gift of all though is saying something that he or she will hold dear. You might use the words of a favourite poem or saying. You could write your own poem or you might speak of his or her attributes and let the other guests know just what a special person the celebrant is. You might say that he or she visited you in hospital every day for six months. You might say he or she does wonderful work for the underprivileged. You might talk about his or her ability to play any role in any drama or tell a funny story about their childhood. This is your chance to let the birthday boy or girl shine. So say how wonderful they are and give them some good advice that they will think on in the years to come. You will have made their coming of age a birthday that, rightly, stands out from the rest.

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