Father of the bride speeches and father of the groom speeches have much in common. They are both celebrating an important occasion in their individual family’s life. Whether or not they approve of their son or daughter’s choice of spouse they will usually have accepted it by the time the wedding day comes along. In most cases, of course, they are genuinely delighted that their son or their daughter has found someone to love. Their speeches will reflect this as they welcome the newcomer into their families and speak of the love they themselves have for their own child. Above all, though, their speeches reflect the fact that a wedding day is a day of celebration and joy.

Attracta Hayden
Glasnevin Educate Together National School
Church Ave
Glasnevin
Dublin 9

Sally Sheils
North Dublin National School Project (NDNSP)
Ballymun Road
Dublin 9

Check out our sample speeches

What do you say at the wedding if you are the step-father of the bride? Obviously a lot depends on the circumstances. If you have reared the bride since she was a baby you will have as many memories to recollect as her father. Indeed you may feel you are her father. However if you married her mother later in the bride’s life your approach may have to be different. Weddings are emotional affairs and feelings are easily hurt. If her father is present you will have to be especially careful of what you say. It is better to concentrate on the bride rather than on her family background. You should speak of her marvellous qualities. You should say that you share the happiness of all present that she has found such a wonderful husband. You should talk about how much she means to you and illustrate it without detracting from how much she also means to her father. So you might speak of her wonderful personality and how much she means to the people who know her and love her. Never ever say anything that detracts from her father even if he walked out on her when she was a baby. The speech given by the step-father of the bride should, in fact, be gracious and very, very tactful.

Check out our sample speeches

What makes a wedding really special? Those concerned often spend months organising everything from the dress to the flowers to the photographer. They will agonise over the guest list and worry about the band they choose to play at the reception. All these things are important, of course, but they rarely consider that the wedding speeches are equally important. The father of the bride or the father of the groom may wonder what he should say but certainly the speeches will be way down the list of important wedding “To do’s”. Yet the words of the best man or the mother of the bride can make an impact on the guests and leave the bride and groom with lovely memories. Everyone cannot write a touching speech, of course, but just as there are professional videographers there are also professional speechwriters. So if you cannot find the words to express your feelings let an expert do it for you. Nobody else will know and your son or your daughter will be delighted that you have gone to so much trouble to say what’s in your heart.

Check out our sample speeches

How many times does a groom say thank you in his wedding speech? Quite often he thanks his parents, the priest, the best man, their in-laws and anyone else they can think of. There is no doubt but that he is sincere in what he is saying but it can be very boring for the guests to listen to the litany. That is not to say that he shouldn’t show appreciation of course it is merely to suggest that he should think of different ways of saying ”Thank you” in other words he should give more thought to writing a flowing speech. Some people can never write a good groom’s speech of course they simply haven’t got it in them. They have the option of approaching a friend or asking a professional for help. The wedding speeches are a central part of the day and a good one will leave a lasting memory both for the guests and for his bride. It’s strange that while grooms employ professional photographers, caterers and organists they think that they can easily write a speech themselves. That is until they try it!

Check out our sample speeches

Has it ever occurred to you that you should censor your own speech? If, for instance you are the father of the bride, it behoves you to say nice things about your daughter. You might, jokingly refer to the fact that, like all fathers of teenagers, you had concerns about the length of her skirt. You should not broadcast the fact, though, that she was expelled form school for selling drugs. The same applies if you are the father of the groom. You might hate the girl your son has chosen but if you cannot find anything good to say about your new daughter–in-law you would be wiser not to speak at all.
Your speech should express your thoughts, of course, but always remember what is said cannot be unsaid. There is no point in upsetting people or making them squirm. A best man should be particularly careful because he may know stories about the groom that the groom would not care for his bride, or his parents to know. In this case discretion is definitely the better part of valour because if he tells that funny story and the bride doesn’t like it he may find that he has lost a friend or that he ends up, courtesy of the groom, with a black eye!
Your speech can be witty but it should never be hurtful and you should never make snide remarks. A good speaker is always gracious especially on social occasions. There are occasions when you speech should be hard hitting but not at a wedding. For the sake of happy ever after check what you intend saying before you say it.

Check out our sample speeches

What do you say when it’s been said before? Finding the right words for a second or subsequent wedding is difficult. There are no go areas, people who mustn’t be mentioned and often, children whose feelings are fraught. The groom at a second or subsequent wedding has to be very careful indeed not to upset his new bride. Sometimes he may be a widower and sometimes he may be divorced and the words he uses have to reflect the exact situation. He may, for instance, have his deceased wife’s parents present because he has had a long and happy relationship with them. On the other hand the only reminder of his divorce may be the fact that his children are present. So it is very important that his speech is gracious and doesn’t offend anyone. It is probably wiser to ask someone who knows the background and who is very tactful to hear his speech and point out any obvious blunders before the big day.
Second wedding speeches by a friend are also subject to the same constraint. In fact it’s like walking on a minefield and you certainly don’t want to set off any explosives.
Your speech should be sincere and very general and refer to the future rather than the past. In other words it should be about wishing the couple every happiness in the years to come without referring to previous weddings or previous spouses.
More and more people are re-marrying and if you have to speak at the wedding remember to be careful about what you say. Short and sweet says it all.

Check out our sample speeches

There is a saying that might have been written especially for these recessionary times. It says, “Today is the seed time, now are the hours of work, and tomorrow comes the harvest and the playtime.” Isn’t that a hopeful saying, one that makes all the doom and gloom bearable?
Most of us are willing to work hard if we feel that our hard work will be rewarded. Most of us are prepared to make sacrifices if we think those sacrifices are worthwhile. These days though we are being bombarded with messages that seem to indicate that there is no light at the end of the economic tunnel. Our Governments are dealing in harsh reality and pessimism permeates the media. They should remember that people need hope. They should remember that, if they want us to overcome this recession, they have to sell the belief that there are better times ahead. They need to resurrect that wartime spirit of endurance and grit, the pulling together of people for a common aim.
The vast majority of people don’t understand economic terms. They only understand what this recession means to them personally. Even city dwellers, though, understand the concept of sowing and reaping. Instead of talking of tough times ahead governments should be promising that we will reap what we sow and that if it’s hard work and enterprise we will be celebrating a harvest supper.

Check out our sample speeches

Brides are traditionally, supposed to be nervous before their weddings. Few of us though give much thought to the groom and the best man who shake at the thought of giving a speech. While a wedding may have been planned and organised over the course of a year or two the speech will often be a hastily written note composed the day before the wedding itself.

That’s a shame because wedding speeches can make or mar a wedding. The flowers will die, the cake will be cut and the photos fade. If the speech is a good one the words used will be remembered and treasured for life. Say the wrong thing, though, and it will also be remembered for all the wrong reasons. So don’t make sarcastic comments about Aunt Flo’s hat or salacious ones about the groom’s ex-girlfriend!

It doesn’t matter who is speaking. The bride may choose to say a few words. A family friend may decide to have his say but whoever it is the content of the speech is critical. It is important that the speaker says what ought to be said on the occasion.

If he is the groom he is expected to say how beautiful his bride is and wonderful his parents were and how he has been welcomed into the bride’s family. He will, of course, toast the bridesmaids. His best man will respond to that toast as well as telling a few, carefully vetted stories about the groom.

The father of the bride and the father of the groom are both expected to say what their children mean to them and welcome the son or daughter-in-law into their families. They will be excused if they tell a few stories about their child’s childhood. The main theme of each speech though should be love, the love of the couple and the love of those present for that couple.

It is said that it takes hours to prepare a good impromptu speech. Certainly it takes hours to write a good speech. So consult the experts or take the time and the trouble to write and rehearse a speech that will linger in the memories of those present. Practise, practise and practise and your speech could be the highlight of the day.

Check out our sample speeches

Despite Christmas it seems we haven’t forgotten our pagan roots. When the dark nights close in we try to banish them with flickering candles and festive gatherings. Winter is the time when, whatever the reason, annual dinners are held and people get together to enjoy good food and good cheer.
It isn’t always for selfish reasons. There are benevolent association dinners where workers gather to raise funds for a colleague who has hit on hard times. There are fundraisers for a children’s charity or for sufferers from an illness such as cancer or heart disease. Perhaps the organisers know that in winter we have more time to think of others and suffering seems more poignant in the dark and dreary months.
On the other hand of course there are family re-unions when families travel long distances just to meet each other and to celebrate the festive season. A Christmas wedding is special simply because besides the frills and flounces we have the sparkle and staff motivational speeches perhaps because they have a captive audience. After all most of us aren’t out playing tennis or fishing in the long dark nights of winter. Clubs and societies therefore, choose to have their parties in December or January.
So if you are invited to a dinner or a gathering make the effort, dress up and go. Our ancestors were right. Fun and laughter and good company are the best possible ways to banish the dark devils of those long cold nights.

Check out our sample speeches

Tradition has it that the father of the groom is an honoured guest at a wedding.
He has no responsibilities except to be pleasant and enjoy himself. So while the father of the bride may wax lyrical about his daughter he is not expected to speak about his son. Most of them, though, like to say a few words about the boy who has now become a man.
If he is speaking the father of the groom’s speech should be short and simple and come from the heart. Basically all he has to do is to welcome the bride and her family into his.
Other than that though he may feel like telling a few tales about his son’s wayward youth and how much he has improved since his new bride has taken him in hand. He will, of course, mention her beauty and what a lovely person she is. He might like to mention how good it is to see so many family members and friends on such a special day. He will leave it to the father of the bride or the best man to toast the happy pair but he should take the opportunity to end his speech with a relevant blessing or good luck wish. The father of the groom deserves his say. After all, without him there would be no groom!

Check out our sample speeches