The Boy Scouts are not the only ones who should “Be prepared.” The father of the bride should also have his speech prepared long before the wedding. If he does he will have time to practise it and as we all know such practice will make perfect. After all everything else will be practised. The singer will practise her songs, the couple will have a practise in church a few nights before the wedding and the bride’s mother will probably practise wearing her new shoes. Being prepared in advance also means that the father of the bride can relax and enjoy the wedding breakfast. His speech should, of course, refer to his pride in his daughter. It should mention some incidents during her growing years. It should speak glowingly of her new husband and welcome his people into the bride’s family. He may choose to give a few words of marital advice and his speech should end with a toast that expresses his loving wishes for his daughter’s happiness and that of her spouse.not

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The father of the bride usually has very little to say in organising a wedding. Usually men are profoundly grateful to leave such organising to their womenfolk. Traditionally, though, the father of the bride usually speaks at the wedding reception. Some of them lose sleep at the prospect. Others are merely nervous but there is no need to be. If the speech is well prepared and well rehearsed the warmth with which friends and family listen will usually ensure it is a success. So welcome the guests, especially your daughter’s new in-laws. Speak glowingly of your daughter. Tell an incident or two about her growing years and express your pride in her and her accomplishments. Mention how ideally suited your new son-in-law is to her and express your belief that he is the ideal match for her. Speak about marriage itself and what it means and, if applicable, mention your own happiness with her mother. Above all end with a personal toast to the bride and groom.

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The speakers are still the same at a Christmas wedding. Both fathers usually have something to say about their offspring. The best man will undoubtedly mention the groom’s exploits while the groom himself will talk about his wonderful bride. Yet the speeches should be slightly different because they should refer to the Christmas period. After all it is a special time of the year and just as you mention special people in your speech you ought to mention Christmas and why it was chosen for the wedding. You might mention snow or Santa or the crib. You could choose to talk about the splurge of shopping that accompanies both Christmas and weddings. You might say that it is a welcoming time of the year and thus an especially appropriate time to welcome guests. Whatever you say at a Christmas wedding make it seasonal.

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What do you say at a second wedding? This can be a problem for someone who has been asked to toast the couple at a second or subsequent wedding. Obviously there are differences from the first wedding. There may be children involved for instance and you must check with the couple as to whether or not they should be mentioned. Good taste will usually dictate that first spouses are not mentioned but sometimes a couple will wish to refer to twenty or thirty years of a happy marriage. Again you should always check. Such weddings are likely to be smaller and more informal too and usually it will be a friend who speaks rather than the father of the bride for example. Some things are always the same though and one such thing is that the speaker will be wishing the couple happiness in their new relationship. So the toast will be the same old fashioned traditional one “Ladies and gentlemen please raise your glasses in a toast to the Bride and Groom”

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It’s the wedding season and every couple will be toasted. What though about toasting the parents of the bride or the parents of the groom? Quite often they have put a huge amount of effort into helping with the wedding arrangements. Certainly they have been responsible for the rearing of the bride and groom. Don’t they deserve to be toasted too? It’s obviously a job for an old family friend or family member who knows them well. He or she can speak of them as friends who have stage managed a wonderful event for their particular child. Later, when all the fuss is over, it will be nice for them to sit back and remember those words of praise. So if you are a guest at a wedding don’t forget the people who have made it all possible.

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Weddings are about frills and flounces. Marriage, though, is about happy ever after. That’s just what any speaker should wish for the couple on their wedding day. It doesn’t matter if you are a best man, a family friend or the mother of the groom. Whoever you are or why you are speaking what matters is what you say on the day. A wedding speech should be sincere but it should also be short. After all it is a social occasion and nobody wants to spend ages listening to speeches. A bit of humour though will never go amiss because everyone likes to laugh, but of course it must be kindly laughter. So speak of the bride or the groom and what they mean to you. Give an incident that describes their kindness, their fun loving nature or how he proposed. Speak about the importance of marriage itself and perhaps give a few tips that you think are important. Above all your toast should wish that couple every happiness in the years ahead.

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Don’t be scared, be prepared. That’s the ideal advice for any public speaker. Whether you have to make a speech at a wedding, a birthday or a bar mitzvah practise still makes perfect. So prepare your speech in advance. By doing so you will also have time to do the research you will need to make the speech really personal. Check out the venue in advance too so that you know there is a microphone in working order. Has it got a stand or will you have to use it and keep your notes in your hand? Naturally the speech will sound better if you know if off by heart. Most people though like to have the comfort of having notes. If so, put them on cue cards because they are less obtrusive than long sheets of paper. Then find a friend who will be willing to listen to your rehearsal of the speech. Then, when the big day dawns you will certainly be prepared and sound professional.

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Wedding speeches don’t have to be given by the best man. The father of the bride does not have to speak at the wedding meal. It’s a day to express love and best wishes, of course, but these can be expressed by anyone at the wedding. The mother of the bride, for instance, might want to speak on behalf of her husband or on her own behalf. The son of the bride might be giving her away and wish to speak. A relative of the bride might like to express his thoughts on the day or a friend or peer of the couple might want to say a few words. No matter who speaks though the thoughts and feelings are the same. They want to wish the couple every happiness in their future lives. They may choose to give a bit of light-hearted advice to the couple or tell a tale about the courtship or about either the bride or groom as children. It’s important, of course, that the speaker remembers that a wedding is a family occasion so smutty jokes are taboo. Other than that, though, they can express, each in his or her own way how much they love the bride or the groom and how much they are enjoying the wedding. Whoever gives the speech should end it with an appropriate toast.

Check out our sample speeches

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